Paula Deen and Jesse Jackson

I've never forgiven Jesse Jackson for his hymietown comment. And I probably never will. I'm always surprised when a left-leaning group invites him to speak or a left-leaning person speaks of him as though he's some sort of awe-inspiring hero. Especially other liberal Jews like me.

I believe that Jackson's personal anti-Semitism is as deep rooted and natural to him as Paula Deen's racism is to her. I think they are as comfortable with those remarks as they are with breathing.

Both "regret" their remarks. But regret doesn't cut it for me. You have to do more than regret something. You have to do something about it.

It's not easy. I know from personal experience.

A woman friend of mine, a fellow progressive, and I went out to dinner with my friend Jeremy a few years ago. (He was visiting from California.) The other woman and I both mistook our waiter and the busboy for the same person. We talked to the busboy, asking him questions about himself that we really thought we were addressing to the waiter. 

The only things they had in common were their skin color and they were both men. 

Jeremy was astounded by our racism and said so right then and there -- which is unusual for him because he is very, very kind to me. But he was horrified. And he was right.

I "regret" what I did. It was super embarrassing. But it was also very, very wrong. So I have been trying to examine my behavior and get rid of it ever since. 

I thought I was getting better. I'm at least more aware. BUT two days ago while I was walking my dog, I waved at a man in the distance who I thought was my neighbor Shar, who was born in India. As I got closer, I realized that the man I had waved to was not Shar. The only things he and Shar have in common are their skin color and they are both men.

I still have SO much work to do.